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Dads With Swag
Dads With Swag

Episode · 4 years ago

Faith, Family & Giving

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

On today’s episode we are looking at Faith, Family, & Giving. My listeners know that God is a big part of my life, and I want to encourage all the dads and men out there to lead their families and lives with God at the center and I hope this episode can give you some … Continue reading Faith, Family & Giving

You are now about to witness the strength of street knowledge. You're listening to dad's with Swag, where your coach Shawn has the tools to help you navigate some of life's ups and downs. Let's do it. Whether you're trying to balance work in life, going through a difficult time in marriage or trying to manifest that perfect mate, Shawn can get you from where you are to where you want to be. Loving husband and dadded two amazing girls. Your coach Shaun can help you Trin your dreams into goals and make them a reality. No more faking change. Is kind of start making change with the swaggy's d out of them all, your coach Sean. WHAT'S UP, everybody? Welcome back to another Great Week of Dad with Swag and check us out on DADS with swagcom check me out on social media at your coach Shawn. You've even email me, Seawan, shot on parts without coms and subscribe on Itunes. We need them, subscribers. I don't even know how many subscribers we have. We could have like twelve, maybe too. I don't know, but I know I'm down for one. My brother's probably down for once. So what has my too. Maybe I wendy. Wendy said she subscribed. Yeah, I got three. WHOO, whoo. I gotta go on there, I got it. I'm not good like tech savvy type person, so I need to like go to itunes and see how many subscribers I have. I know that when I made it past five hundred instagram followers. So I hire Christina. She's an amazing social media person. If you guys, anybody out there is looking for a social media person, hit me up and I'll give you the contact information to the to the girl that does my stuff. She's awesome and she's amazing, but she had this like system, right, because she's like a social media expert. She had this system and she's like we gotta get you know, because I'm like why are we following all these Whaka Duos? Like I'm tired of looking at like buff Bros and all this like prep food Sunday and Hashtag fit fam and all this stuff like making me feel selfconscious about myself because I hind take my ass to the gym and like three years. Right. So I'm like, why are we following these people? I'm not too happy, right. And then Oh, girls like honey how come you're following like all these half naked girls on your instagram? Like, should I know something about this? I'm like, I don't know, Baby. I'm like, Christina followed all these people that didn't even my type of woman, you know what I'm saying? I like them thicker and peanut butter in the freezer. I'm like this same type of type of yoked out, somebody who can body slam me. And and Christina said, as soon as I get to five hundred followers, then I don't have to then I can unfollow all these people. I was like at five hundred and one, straight on, following people left and right. It was crazy. But like three hours I still have a whole bunch of people to unfollow. But so she's good, man. She's really good at what she does. I think when I started, before she took over my Instagram, I had like twelve followers. So, oh, she's really good. If you're looking for something, hit me up. I'll be sure to pass on her information. So this week, man, family, faith and giving. You know, it's some of the most important things in life right there, and especially as a man, you know, it's our job as a man to captain the shit, to lead the pack. I know there's some dudes out there that are like stay at home dad's and mom's bringing home all to Bacon, and I know there's some dudes out there that, you know, maybe aren't as maybe both parents are working but the mom makes more money or things like that. You can't let that's the that that doesn't define who leads the shit right. Who Brings Home to Bacon doesn't doesn't define who drives the boat, who leads the pack right. And it's and it kind of comes down from like evolution, like years and years, like wolves and cavemen and like all that stuff. It's like the the mail leads the pack. And as a man, it's...

...our job and our responsibility to determine how we're going to lead our family, you know. and Are we going to choose to lead our family with a face faith based relationship, you know, knowing about God, whatever your God is. You know, my homies Jesus, but your homie might be somebody else, and that's not like my place to define what religion you going to be. But are you going to you're going to belong to a religion, you're going to believe in something. You're going to teach your kids that there's something way bigger than them, something way bigger than them, and you're going to encourage them to learn for themselves and encourage them to like dive de you know that, I do. You know I'm A. I'm our family goes to church on Sundays, but you can't just leave church on Sundays right. So we pray at dinner, we pray at meals. We're not too good at praying with breakfast because my house in the morning, oh my goodness, is Vanana. There might be some yelling going on. It's like grab a Grenel, butor get in the car. So we don't necessarily pray at breakfast, and that's probably when we should pray the most, but we don't. You, and you know what, we pray at dinner and our family. If you guy, if you're out there, you're a listener and you got something going on in your family right now and you need somebody to pray for you, hit me up on social media at your coach, Shawn, we will pray. My family will pray for you at our dinner table. All right now, I'm going to tell you this right now. This is bananas. Okay, our family dinner table is batting a thousand right now with our prayers. We've been praying for this woman, Miriam, had some cancer going on in her life. Prayed for probably like six months, right, and she was still going through the cancer. Boom, cancers gone. Right. We had cathy who was also had had some cancer going on. Right for family friends. These people cancers gone. Had another grandma was in the hospital. Prayed on, prayed on, preyed on. Boom, grandma's out the hospital. I had a buddy his mom was in hospice, right about to about to go. He's like, man, can you guys really hook me up pray, do some praying, and we take that seriously. You know, people will be putting out these like you know, social media message is like pray for my family please, and we take that to heart. We're like all I do, his mom at a hospice. Crazy like just stuff like that. So we take it to heart, like we really pray and when we pray, we do it and I have a rule. So the first person, because sometimes, you know, kids are kids, and I do it too sometimes. We we have a rule the first person to take a bye to their foods set leads the prayer right, because we get excited right. We're all in a hurry. But how what are you doing with your family right? What are you doing with your family to lead them right, to lead them down the right path? And I'm not telling you, I'm not saying that like my family's perfect and we're all good and great just because we go to church and just because we pray right. It's bigger than that. It's more about setting the tone, because I have a bad day, just like people who don't go to church or people that don't pray, but I can let my kids know that. You know, man, Dad's having a crappy day to day. But I'm going to try to give that to God because I know that he's bigger than me and I know that he can handle this better than I could handle this. or Ay, I messed up, and when you mess up, you can give it to God and you can let him handle it. You know, my oldest daughter this week is on a class trip. She's going to play these sports competitions. The the company that owns her school owns a bunch of different schools and they do these things called the games every year and six seventh and eighth graders go out...

...to a different campus throughout the world every year and they play these Games and, you know, shoot, I was nervous, man, I was nervous. It's my baby girl, she's leaving. This is the first time she left the house and let alone like flying by herself without a mom or dad or you know. It was hardest on my youngest because this was like they're they're never a part. You know, I'm divorced, so I'm not with my kids all the time. I'm with them a lot of the time, but not all the time. There with their mom, you know, a few days a month, and so I kind of get used to not being with them. But now she's like in another state without her mom, so you know. And she was starting to get a little nervous to the night before she left because she had never been away from home before, right, and she never wanted to go to summer camp or anything, because she's just not that extroverted of a person. And so she was really nervous and I went into my bathroom and I have this diamond cross, this cute little cross that I got back in a day, and I put it on her and I said, you know, here are, you take daddy's cross and Jesus will be with you wherever you go, because I already told her daddy was in her heart, but she won't really buying it. But then once I told her that, Hey, God's going to be with you, he's got you and he will watch over you and he will keep you safe and he will protect you and he'll make sure you don't cry on the plane and if you get scared, you just hold onto this cross and I'll put it on her neck. And it's crazy because immediately she like calm down, she chilled. She's like, Oh, you're right, Daddy, Jesus is always with me, and as a parent, that's like cool. It's like she gets it. You know, she gets it. She gets that she can fail and it's still going to be cool. She can be scared and it's still going to be cool because there's something that's bigger than us, that's out there that's helping guide us keep us some point. What are some things that you're doing with your family? Man, like what how are you guiding your ship? How are you guiding your family ship? Are you making sure that you're not just like spoiling them with all this material stuff and not spoiling what love, because that has a lot to do with it too. We all want like there's probably not a parent out there that's like, man, I wish my kid's life was crappier than my life. We all want better for our kids, right, like if we didn't get a new car at sixteen, want to work to get our kids in new cards sixteen. If we didn't, if our parents couldn't afford to send us to college. We want to make sure that we work hard enough to send our kids to college. You know, we always want better for our kids. But how come we don't talk about that with faith? How can we don't talk about that with beliefs? You know, I want my kids to have a stronger relationship with God than what I have, right, because I got a pretty strong relationship with God. But how came we not talking about that stuff, because that's important stuff to talk about. You know, we got, we have to be the leaders of the ship. It's our responsibility. If we're not leading the shit, then it's going to go awry. How you guys leading Your Shit? What do you leading your ship to? You give me up on social media at your coach, Shan at your coach on on all social media, Sean shot off on socom. Our First Song, all the songs today, are my youngest daughter Eva, her birth year songs that were big hits. So get ready to crank that with soldier boy. You sols of what I got in day. Yeah, kind of souls of Bo crankback three times from left the right. Let me Frank. I mean, thank that's all your...

...buty's Superman. That's all I wan you like. That's all I wanted you right. That's all I want you crank. That's all I me frank you, Wi Mero, m me bank. That's all the superman. That's all I wanted you. That's all I want you crank. That's all I want you. Crack. That's all I believe. That me wrong, Super Man. Crack that roll. Woke Up. I want jock on them hate on my when I do that, soldier boy, I need to lift a crank that thing now. I'm jacking on your jacket on and if we get the fight, and no, you can't me at your local party. Yes, I crank it every day. Haters get man, Cuz I got me. So baby night, frank it why wrong. I thank. That's all. But is Superman. That's all I want. You like. That's all I wanted you write. That's all I wanted. You crank. That's all I crank. You Wi me Rong, mommy blank. That's all. The Superman. That's all I wanted you write. That's all. How you crank. That's all you crank. That's all. Anna crack it up for Shaw. Wanna be me, soldier boy on the man. They be looking in my knick saying is do bab you can't do what I mean. Don't total do it. I mean. I say you try to do what I mean. Man, that Damn Merk, Wi me wrong. That's all the superman. That's all you. That's all I want you. That's all I wan. You crank. That's all. Frank, you wrong, I mean. That's all the superman. That's all I wanted you write. That's all you cr that's all I wan. You crank. That's all. Crank. Soup, soup, something, soup, something, soup, something, shrank. That's all the superman. You Soup, crank, you wife me wrong. I thank. That's all, but is superman. That's all. That's all I wan you. That's all, you crank. That's all. I meank, you wrong, me bank. That's all. The Superman. Now now back to dad's with swag. That's your host, Shann Alfonso. Let's do it. Hey, what's up everybody? Welcome Back Dad's with swag. We're talking all things faith, family and giving. If you want to chime in on this discussion, could always find us on social media at your coach, Sawn. Email me any questions. Sean Alfonso, Shan at Shan ALFONSOCOM WE gotta caller. Yeah, so, Chelsea, yes, you are live on Air...

Dad's would swag. How are you? What's up, Sean? I'm doing great. How are you? I'm doing amazing. Thanks for calling in. Absolutely glad to be a part of it. Yeah, definitely. So, word on the street is your newly engaged? I am. I am. Yes, I am great, and your fiance is a man of God. He is, and you are a woman of God. Yes, sir, who whoo? Yeah, look at that. Some more swaggy people out there that love Jesus, for sure, for sure. So let's just get in. What you know? What actually, Chelsea, want you tell a little tell my listeners a little bit about yourself. Just so they can get to know you before we dive in. Sure. So, I'm originally from the East Coast. Moved out to Arizona about five years ago. I love the desert heat. I had a company here in the valley. I do digital marketing and with the focus and business development, entrepreneurship and social media. So I work with companies all over the valleys and helping them get their message kind of spread throughout, throughout the nation, throughout the world. Some some clients there are international as well. So I do that. I have a background in entrepreneurship. Also working on launching a company where raising capital. The kind of entrepreneur here in general, love innovation, love the Spenix community and, yeah, just hustling. You know, it sounds good. Sounds good. We all out here just trying to hustle, for sure. So what were some of the challenge you faced? Trying to find a person who is fun, who knows what's up, but also has like a purpose driven life and has like a passion for God. There's plenty of challenges. I'm sure I could probably go on all day about all the hurdles that their work to overcome. I think for me, and this is very personal for me. My biggest challenge was the fact that I'm a busy person. I, like I said, I have, you know, a company that I'm, you know, absolutely in love with. I love my client I love my work. Even when I was in college, you know, I was always kind of a go getter. I worked full time and went to school full times, so I was really busy and what I found was that you have people who were either like uper dedicated to the dating life, you know, they want to go out all the time see while the Times do with you all the time, or you have to put effort in just to make yourself available. So that was probably curdle number one. curdle number two, even though I was always plugged into kind of faith based groups. You know, I went to church on Sunday and I was pretty plugged into the churches I was always involved in. I'd help with different youth events or youth groups or a hopefully camp. That wasn't necessarily number one. I wasn't there for the dating seeing and number two, that wasn't necessarily there's people weren't always my ideal fit in the dating seat right. So, although I wanted to find somebody who lived a burgoster than life and had similar faith and belief that I did. I wasn't on the hunt to find that, and I was I was sometimes too busy to even, you know, go out and speak that and those people just weren't around. So those are probably the biggest hurdles, you know, and I could go on all day, yeah, about what that look like, but those were my biggest one. That's so true. I was, you know what, I was in the same exact spot. Like, I'm plugged into my church and I volunteer and lead a small group and all that stuff. But I had made a commitment to myself that I'm not going to date anyone from my church, right, because I got two small kids and they like church. And if I date somebody from my church and it doesn't go right, who's leaving? You know? I'm like, I can't leave church. So I'm you know, I told myself, I'm like, I'm not going to I want a woman of God, but I'm not going to date anyone at my church, and then I wouldn't go to other churches, so I could never meet a woman of God. It was crazy and I agree with you, man. It's tough when what you focus on is what you get, and if you're focusing on business, you don't get more business. If you focus on kids, you know you're going to have a healthy family. And when you focus on that relationship, it takes time and it...

...you know, you have to like step away from and said, all right, God's going to handle my business for a minute. I got to go out and be, you know, more proactive and and finding myself a partner. What were some of your requiring? I know I had a laundry list, a laundry list of requirements that I had for my soontobe second wife, like I had a laundry lit like God, you know, I prayed about it constantly and I and I did a lot of self reflection and found out, you know, what do I really how do I really want somebody to love me? And how do I really want to love somebody, to be truthful to myself and to God and not have to like have all this fake masks on, right? How am I going to get somebody to love me? For me, it was, you know, I had a laundry list to things, like I wanted my person to be this, that and the other thing. What were some of the things on your list that you when you was when you was checking things off. So I had, you know, and thinking back over this now in my life, I realized that I had to with. I had what I would now call a want list and I'd have, and I have, a need list. I didn't really think of them that way at the time, like they were all needs right, I needed everything, but I can see that now. My want list was, like I said that then, I thought was essential. I really wanted I'll say this before I go into this. As a female, I think that sometimes we get caught up on details in the NUTIA and sometimes we take things too seriously, and so my first advice to anybody else in my position or you know dating, looking for that person as a female, is to just slow your role for a minute, like take a step back and realize that, you know, everything doesn't have to be perfect all the time, because it's not going to be. With that being said, I approached dating from that from that way, so I was always a little bit casual about things. But the first two things that I thought, I knew I needed in somebody was I wanted a musician. I wanted, you know, I like music. Always with sexty. To me it was always something I'm very attractive to, both from a face stampoint and worship and just in a you know, physical human standpoint. It was my getaway, with my release. I loved a dance, that kind of stuff. So I thought for sure, like the guy that I'm looking for, you know, plays music or things or do something right, even producing, I'd be fine with that. So I musician was one of them and the other one was I wanted him to be me in some way, shape or form, involved in in ministry, involved in the church, not necessarily together, right. I didn't want him to like lead, lead church music, but I just I knew church was passionate for me and I knew that I love music. The guy that I'm with now is neither one of those. So let's talk about efforts. I guess my need list with now, I can say, is a need list, and I didn't realize it at the time. I also knew that I needed somebody who love God like I love God, but not just said that they love God, but truly had a relationship with him and that was a part of their decision making. And I needed someone who respected me, both as a woman, as a business person, as a daughter and member of my family, and I knew that at the end of the day, and this is what I learned in the dating scene. Right at the end of the day, if I had those two things, they love God like I did and they would suspected me and my roles in my life, then the rest of it would work out. Yeah, definitely. You have some of those nonnegotiables that are that are very important. And it's funny because, you know, I do some coaching on helping people like manifest their ideal mate and and that's what it comes down to, like those needs, in those wants, and people always have these wants that are so superficial, and not all of them are really superficial, but a lot of them are like just really like vanilla, you know. And when you and when you start peeling...

...back the layers of the onion and digging deep, then you can really figure out like, for you, you just wanted a man that loved Jesus. He didn't have to work in the in the church, he didn't have to like be a martyr for Jesus, but he had to have the passion. So then you, guys, can can gel right, how you made it and you intentfully went out and took time from work and time from business, in time from doing what you do, to intently go out and pursue happiness for yourself and pursue a relationship for yourself. You met this man of your dreams. Things are popping. How has it paid off for you to be patient? Because I guarantee, and I don't know because I haven't asked this question before, but I guarantee that there were some frogs before you got to his prints. Right, there were some frogs there. There are some fake as Jesus loving people, you know. They're like, Oh, if you love Jesus, I love Jesus too. Yeah, so how how did the payoff? How spectacular was that payoff for you to wait, because I know for me personally, the payoff was more than I can possibly comprehend. Like, I didn't even think that this level of love and amazement that I have with my fiance was possible. Right, I didn't think like God. I didn't think God can bless me this in super, super imperfect man who's got all these challenges in life, that he would bless me so abundantly. Right, but I was patient. I waited because there was a lot of, you know, fake princesses out there that I'm like hey, you know, this ain't gonna work. God, you don't have to bring me something a little better than this. And he did. He delivered on it, and now, you know, things are rocking and rolling. How is the payout? How is it paid off for you to be patient and to really wait for that right dude? I think for me, for me it's kind of about the lifestyle and the journey of what I have now. Like that is the payoff for me. And there's two things, you know, I was just thinking over while you're asking that question that probably are the most rewarding. You know, they're the biggest payoffs because I waited. One was the fact yet God didn't need to prove himself to me. But we did right and and for full disclosure, I actually knew my fiance back when we were in high school living in North Carolina. So we split up after college, I dated, I did that whole team and he came back into my life and I remember, I remember thinking after college and going through that dating seam. You know, as a female, you get insecure and I'm like nobody's going to love me right, like I'm not, you know, I'm not putting out, I'm not doing all these other things. I live this busy life. People aren't going to come find me. You know, this is going to be a hard road. And and God, although I dated some cool people, and I'll say that, and I dated plenty of frogs, the when you work, having this inating me and come back into my life was another proof of God thing. Helpsy, I got you like like. You're all worried about how things are going to work out and if you just keep doing what I've put in front of you. So you just keep hustle, like I told you to hustle, you keep taking care of our relationship, you keep staying focused on what's number one. The rest is going to come. It's going to come, and when it comes, it's going to be better than you expected, and it totally was. So that was number one right to payoff was that this God showed himself to me, and I count on that now in my life, like when I hit one of those days while I'm just overwhelmed or, you know, clients are being crazier, things just aren't right, I'm like, you know, what God to care of me for, like, what am I worried about? Dude? You know, isn't that crazy? Like it's funny too, because I've talked to so many people were the same thing happen. You know, I was out there looking for my misright, because everybody's Mr and Mrs Right or different. I was out there looking for my Miss Right and I've done tripped over because God threw it right in front of me. For you're what I'm saying, like...

...absolutely wasn't expecting it. It was a moment that I wasn't I wasn't expecting it. I wasn't looking for it at that time. I wasn't like, you know, I'm like, Oh, this will be fun, this will be cool. She's a she's a rad chick. I'm like, we going to have some fun together, but he done, you know, he threw it right in front of me. He's like trip over this broad because she's she's awesome. You know, and I know that you're busy reason your kids and you're busy doing this and handling that and handling this, and I know you love me and I love you. Saw My thrower at you and that's what he did, and I was like, Whoa, thanks man, good looking out, because you know, you know, one day I will be on a radio shouting out your praises about how you throw this amazing woman all way, because I lived a life that was dedicated to you and I was purposefully looking for this amazing person. That's amazing for me, like other people might see my pience and they'll be like wow, what a whack of do, but to me is everything that I need and everything that I want, and everybody is needs are different. So not this, this, this could be awkward for him because I don't know if y'all talked about this, but what about the babies? What about the kids? The family planning? Have you guys talked about that stuff yet? Yeah, we have, you know. And and this is another one of those things where I think, I think, being a woman, we come from a different side of of the conversation, right because for us in society, until we're engaged or even until we're married, it's kind of how do to talk too much about that stuff because you don't want to feel like you're pressuring the guy. You don't want him to feel like that's the only thing you want. You know, not's all, it's about all that kind of stuff. So there's all these like societal preconcede notions that come to it that we always have to deal with. But but I was really grateful for the fact that my fiance's name is travis and he and I have always been pretty open with each other and I think the thing that made it easy to have some of the conversations we've had about kids and marriage and, you know, sex and all that kind of stuff is the fact that we both respect each other and so we realize that we have our own opinions, but that changes over time. So what we've been good at is having casual conversations about what we know we want and then what we think we want right. And so when we when we decided to date again and, you know, really give this thing like a try and probably look at marriage, you know, we were twenty five years old, so it's like what are we doing here? And so after we started dating again, yeah, it came up pretty soon. It's like, okay, we'll tell to your husband. And I travel a lot for work, like a lot, like at least once a month, and so that conversation came up pretty soon. Like do you want kids? When do you want kids? And is traveling still going to be a part of your life, because that effects, you know, how we raise our children and and when we have children and all that stuff. So we've gotten and thankful for us, because there's times where I'm like, yeah, you know what, I do want kids. For a long time I thought I didn't, but I realized I can't imagine my life at forty or fifty and not having, you know, a fifteen or twenty or twenty five year old. You know, I can't imagine what that would look like. So danswers, yeah, I know, I do want kids, but I don't know when. And he's like, I want kids, I want two of them, I want to start having him at this time, you know. So he's a little more certain on that stuff than I am. But we respect the fact that God has us, you know, focused on some things right now, and that's okay, right, and like in a year and might be like you know what, I'm ready, like let's go, and I didn't know that right now. And so we try to give each other room to be able to have those conversations, but also not, you know, give each other room for the journey and give each other room to like figure out what that process looks like and and figure out what those things look like. And that we talked about like raising our kids and what that looks like to like we have a dog, and so sometimes, you know, when he thanks the dog, I'll joke and I'll be like you better not hit our kid, our kids like...

...that, right, like all she did with some off the splore and so so I think it's about making it casual but also making it comfortable, right. You have to be able to talk about that stuff that's real and that's going to affect your future together. Definitely. Definitely. Yeah, that discipline, man, that's a big one, you know, because I think, at least for me, you know, we're a non violent household, like there's no point in like smacking a kid because they did something wrong. Like it's funny. There's an Adam Sandler movie that reminds me of us all the time, where he's like, you know, don't hit yourself, you know, don't talk back to your sister, don't hit your sister, and then he hits the kid, you know what I'm saying, and it's like okay, like we just told the kid not to hit the sibling, but you just smack the kids like what that? You're sending like mixed signals here, POPs. Right. But it's important to get that stuff off the table, like, because I know that I have some friends. They went to you know, they were both Christ followers and they went to two different churches and each of them their church was the church, the bomb ass church in town, and they got together and they had, you know, they got married and all this stuff, and then they had after the marriage, they kind of had a hard time going like well, okay, which church is now going to be our home church, right, you know, is it going to be my church? Is it going to be your and I'm like, why didn't you guys talk about this before you put a ring on it? Like that's kind of an important thing, you know. I I think that he they were saving themselves for marriage. So I think that some some things were on the brain other than what church we going to call our home church. I'm like, man, looks like you going to hurt church now me because you know, to rush the gun. Yep, that's great, though. I'm glad to hear. I'm glad you called in Chelsea this is awesome. I'm glad to hear that there's people out there that can express to my audience that, with with some purposeful prayer and with some commitment and a whole bunch of trust and faith, that that person you're looking for, that person that God has already molded in your likeness, is there. He's out there and and and it's not a matter of having to go to all these different clubs or sacrificing your integrity to go to find that person, because sometimes he'll just thrown in front of us and we going to trip right over. I think at the end of the day, when I realized is that, and it sounds like it was similar to your story with your fiance. You know, like I just knew, in my life I needed to continue to attract people around me that I wanted to surround myself with. Right, like what I accept it out of people. I needed to to begin to attract that and surround myself with people like that, which isn't about a relationship sexually, right, that's just about my friend circle, my business circle. Who Do I want around me? And when you do that all the time, when you're continually trying to connect with people, because of people's worth and people's value. Whoever that person is, they're going to there's going to be there right and you know, whether you're out at dinner or whatever it is, if you're continually putting yourself around people who are the type of people you want around you, you're going to stumble upon that person and it's going to be better than what you expected, for sure. For sure, that's great advice. Well, Chelse, thank you so much for calling in. Absolutely know my listeners definitely appreciated it. And why don't you throw out some of your social media information or your business contacts in case any of my listeners out there are in the need for someone in the marketing business? You never know. Absolutely yeah, so again, my name's Chelsea disers. You can find me, you know all the social media facebook, twitter, instagram, snapchat, hey, wherever you want. I am on most everything. See I'm forgiven thee. I am forgiven. And if you want to look at my business or under Digret consultment, consult meant and the antiques, so find me. I'd love to connect what you're interesting business or just want to let me know what...

...you thought of the podcast. Awesome. Thanks for calling and have a great day. You too, stone. Talk to you about bye. Bye. Yeah, got a caller. That was deep man. Anybody else out there want to like share some of their thoughts on family faith giving? Hit US up social media at your coach, Shan, you could email me, Sean Shanofansocom Dad's would swagcom the next song. Party like a rock star, shot boy, porter like a rock star, with the way in a white like a cock. Call me and get me put a store, build and want to change boys. Watch all you'll change the game. They know to war, my Mama, to star. I'm on the golf course, dripping with the off the shower, Travis off, the Rock Star mentality. I'm jumping in the marry me. They see me, they just my eyes. Make them go down quick like the top. Any with a shop, you know what we do. Now back to dad's with swag. It's your host,...

Shawn Alfonso. Let's do it. Hey, what's up everybody? Welcome back to dad's with swag. Dad's with swagcom. You guys ever want to Chime in to an episode or if you got any tips on what we should talk about next week? Hit US up at your coach Shawn could always email me. Sean Shan Alfonsocom I got an email question. Man, today is like the bomb day. We got a caller and an email question. What? What? This is awesome. I'm going to read this because I can't do two things at once, so I'm just going to read it straight up, word for word. Maybe you can answer this question. I never thought I missed having a higher power in my life because I had stopped going to church after I was in high school. Then I met a man who is very religious and it almost surprised me how much and how fast I fell in love with him. He helped me bring God back into my life and I don't know where I would be without him or God. I see a lot of my friends, or even family, struggling with not having God in their life and not being able to believe life will happen when it's supposed to. How can I not seem like a Bible thumper and preach that church is a life changing place and get them to believe that if they bring God in church into their life, they can be happier? Holy Guacamoli. That's a great question, man. First of all, the challenge I have the same challenge, man. How do I go out there and let them know that Jesus is my jam without sound like a Bible thumper, right, without being like all holier than now, like straight holy roller? And this is what I found. That works best for me. Right, it's just lead by example. And when people say, Yo, Sean Man, how did you handle that situation like that, I'd like because a god straight up give him all the glory, all the credit, you know, and when people ask you, you know, hey, how is your relationship? Seems so strong and how do you seem so not stressed and be like Yo, because I started going back to church, I got a little geod up in me. You know, this is what's changed my life. And then let him know, hey, if you ever want to come with me, Holler right, don't, don't, don't throw it down their throat. Don't be like Yo, why didn't you come to church? You need to get to church. You need to go to church. A I just started going to church now. You need to start to go to church now. You can't do that because people wing to be like, oh my gosh, she got some Jesus in her and now she's straight crazy. But if you lead by example. Right, people are going to wonder. They're going to wonder what's different about you now then was about you in the past? Right. Are you out there on South beach getting all, you know, Miami style with it party and all the time, you know, you out there getting Jiggy with it out in Vegas, getting all hi fi, or are you like doing things that are more in line with a purpose driven life? Now, my saying you can't go to Miami, you can't go to Vegas. You can go to those places and you can do those things, but the big difference is, do you stay out till one in the morning or you stay out till zero in the morning? You know what I'm saying? Do you stay out and you trying to look for a new piece of ass everywhere you go, or you going out to like a nice show and enjoying it and bringing some laughter and...

...fun and entertainment into Your Life? It's all about the purpose, right. And once your friends are like, Oh man, how come you're not like trying to scope out a new husband, or how come you know you're doing this or you're doing that, then you can just be like, straight up, it's because I started going back to church. If you want some of this happiness, it could be found here, right, because it's the same thing what you know. Back to my instagram followers. I'll follow a lot of people to sell these like diet wraps. I don't know what they do, but you wrap them around your body and you supposed to be on a diet. I don't get it. But anyways, what if you was on one of those right and your friends are like, oh my gosh, girl, how could you look so good? What did you do right? You won't be like, Yo, I checked off this rat and it worked. Hella good. You should do it. You could do the same thing with God, the same thing with church. Yo, girl, I check this out. This is what I did and this is why I'm acting the way I'm acting now. This is why I'm happier than I've ever been. That was a great question. Thank you so much for hitting us up with that giving so that's the next thing we got. We kind of got off topic a little bit. I'm not we stayed on topic, but I got off my I take like really good notes on my shows and we got thrown off a bit, but that's cool. I like it. But check it out we got to hit the giving part right, because that's important, because you're leading your shit, you're the man of the house, you're the captain of the family. How do you teach your family to give back, because that's important. You have to give back. No matter how little you think you might have, you got way more than a lot of people. And how do you give back? One of the things that we do in our family and I love it. It like it warms my heart, it makes me, you know, it makes the kids happy, makes Megan happy. You know, it's just I like it a lot. And on top of our tithing, like you know, we tied the church and all that, but this is on top of that. This is what we do. This is a game we play. We go out to dinner, right, because we don't go out that much. We like to try to have these family home cooked meals and plus my girls got so much damn homework that we can't be going out to dinner. But we go out to dinner every once in a while and sometimes when we go out to dinner we like to play this game, right, we will look around a restaurant, will try to find a family or some kit like we've done it a couple times for people that was out on Prom will try to find these people and we'll just let God like point the people out to us and we'll be like them, those are the people right there. And then we buy him dinner anonymously, right, and we tell the waiter, the waitress, we like hey, you can't tell him it was us. All right, that's part of a part of a trick. You just gotta say it was anonymous, right, and we make sure we tipped the person a little bit extra to make sure that they stay on point, and then we just continue to eat our meal, eat our food, and then we watch the reaction, right, and we watch these people get blessed or right there and how excited they are and how emotional they get. Like we've had we were we were at a restaurant, man, I can't remember them of it. It's out here in Arizona. You ever come out here if you live here locally? It's his restaurant. It's got this like big slide you can slide down and they serve like cotton candy for dessert. It's a cool, like Arizona type restaurant, right. It's like what you would think, like an Arizona restaurant would be. I think there's like a big bull out in the parking lot, like a live bull, not a fake one, like this is Arizona, remember, peeps? So but I can't remember it. But it was this whole group of people, right, and who were there in Prom and we're sitting like a couple tables over and we bought the whole prom table. There's like, I don't know, fifteen kids. We bought them all dinner, right, and one of the kids he had his arm. We noticed he had his arm in a sling, but we didn't think much of it. The kid starts crying. The night before he had got hit by a car, broke his arm and his parents were kind of stressing about money because all these medical bills that are...

...coming down the way and he wasn't sure if he was going to be able to make it a prom or not, and he was just down on the world, like this is his senior prom man in his.

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